


Peeling away the layers of a redneck - OR  - How to Love Daryl Dixon

by Butterflyfish



Series: Getting to know Daryl Dixon. [1]
Category: The Walking Dead (TV)
Genre: F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Sexual Content, Shameless Smut, Smut
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-06-15
Updated: 2015-06-23
Packaged: 2018-04-04 13:13:30
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 19,339
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4138890
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Butterflyfish/pseuds/Butterflyfish
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Newcomer to the prison Abra (Abs)  Finds herself alone with Daryl, on a regular basis. She has a bit of a crush on him but never dreamed he might feel the same.<br/>Daryl never dreamed he'd feel anything like he does for her. How will his new attitude to life and people reflect on their relationship?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I was reading through some fic and got a little inspiration for a POV Daryl and original female Character.
> 
> N.B. I have now made this part of a series where we follow Daryl and Abra through different situations.   
> Cannon not cannon... TWD world but not true to the series as such.
> 
> Between Merle's death and the fall of the Prison a quiet time, a happy and calm time, ensues in my mind, and so, here we are based. Right there on the timeline between death on one side, and destruction on the other. 
> 
> I'm thinking this might flit between Abra and Daryl's POV. Work in progress, as ever. 
> 
> I love you all for reading, even if you only get this far *kisses*

 I was hiding in my hut when they found me. A crude structure made of large branches, leaning together in a pyramid. The old, over stretched, slightly torn, blue tarpaulin I'd found months before thrown over to keep out the drizzle. 

 

 

I guess it was more a teepee than a hut. 

 

I'd heard them coming moments before. The crunch of their shoes, their hushed whispers. Two men. Men scared me now. Walking the woods in daylight was as bad now as walking the streets just before dawn in the old world.

"Here" I heard a gruff voice whisper. They'd followed me, picked me out, and I knew now I had no choice. I pulled my old hunting knife up beside my ear, and crouched with my toes on the floor, my knees almost up to my chin. I was ready.

Come at me, bitches.

"Hey" I heard another voice call "anyone in there?" It was a softer voice, a nicer voice. But I would not be fooled anymore. I waited, ready to pounce. I tried to steady my breathing, but failed miserably as the tarpaulin was slid back. I launched myself at the unknown assailants, yelling deep and low in the back of my throat. An Asian man, my age maybe, jumped back out of my way and I fell at the booted feet of a greaser. I looked up and a crossbow was pointed square at my forehead.

I scrambled to my feet, knife still raised despite my fumble. 

"I don't want trouble" I said "just trying to survive." I tried to make my eyes steely and hard like the greaser's, but I knew nothing I could say would stop him getting what he wanted.

Suddenly I realised that I was done. Whether it was the cold blue stare, or the fact that I'd failed to even make these guys flinch, I just knew I couldn't do this anymore, alone, out there in the forest. I dropped my knife to my side and felt my shoulders sag as tears welled and spilled from my eyes. "I just want to survive" I said again, but it was more a plea than a statement, "please, take what you want, please just don't hurt me" 

The greaser jutted his chin at me, crossbow still held up, and his gruff voice came out in a harsh whisper

"You alone?" I nodded. I'd been alone a long time. 

"Ask her the questions" the Asian said then, and I was too confused to even wonder what that might mean at the time. "Daryl?" He said "she's alone, she's scared, look at her" words spoken as if I couldn't even hear them, talking about me in front of my face.

"How many walkers you killed?" The greaser, Daryl, asked. I shrugged 

"I... I don't remember" I stuttered. "Too many to count" I looked between Daryl and the Asian and back again "what does it matter?" They didn't answer, but Daryl asked another.

"How many people?" I paused on that one. Again too many, far too many. I sighed and the greaser gestured at me with that bow of his "how many people" he asked again, more aggressively.

"Three" my voice cracked "three people" I slumped to the floor remembering. A rapist, a prick, and my dear brother. I wiped at my face.

"Why?" The Asian said. I looked up at him. 

"Two to survive, and one to put him out of his misery" I covered my face with my hands and let out a sob. I didn't like to think about Ben. It was too much.  As I uncovered my face I saw the greaser had his crossbow at his side

"We gotta place" he said, looking softer, kinder somehow. The frown, the steely stare, were gone "s'not far, s'not much, but it's safe." 

 

They let me gather my few possessions. A photo of Ben I'd somehow managed to keep intact, a gun, my knife, a few spare clothes. I'd run out of tinned food, but had a squirrel I had hung a couple of days which might be good, I grabbed it, too, folded up my tarpaulin and shoved it in my pack. 

"Walkers?" I asked as they led me to their car. 

"It's what we call them," the Asian said. Glenn, he introduced himself as. "What do you call them?" I looked forward, and trundled on

"Assholes" I answered, and the greaser, who walked ahead of us, let out a harsh laugh. I looked at Glenn, slightly confused, but he was smiling, so I smiled back. it felt good, and right on my face.

 

* * *

 

 

Every day at the prison, back in my early days there, I would sit in one of the watch towers and observe the comings and goings. Carol had helped to teach me to shoot with Sacha in between their other work, I was getting pretty good, but Sacha was amazing. 

With the sight up to my face I looked out. A twinkling in the distance catching my eye, and I turn my sights onto it. 

Daryl

Over the first month I realised he was distant, disturbed, quiet. Rick's second in command. I was so intrigued by him that I'd often catch myself staring for minutes at a time. So far as I had worked out, he had never noticed. 

But now here he came, this would be his last run on the bike, he said the morning he had left to Rick as I watched, earwigged, due to the winter coming thick and fast. He said it would be a bad one. How he knew I guess I'll never know. As far as I was concerned, this winter would be the best one, every winter outside the fences had been hideous, even when I had Ben with me for warmth and comfort, it had been bad. No shelter and so much rain. And now further north, there was the ever present threat of winter snow. 

He guided the bike through a wide collection of walkers and as he approached the gates they opened, almost like magic. I pulled the rifle to my side and noticed Carl was there opening the gates, trying not to look excited at Daryl's return. The young boy had changed even in the few months I had been here, but still the bike and the greaser excited him, not yet was he the teenager he'd later turn out to be, the young man inside him still buried in a mass of confusion and hormones. 

Daryl parked the bike, and sat astride it a moment, chatting with Carl and Beth. Then Carl pointed and all three looked up to me. 

Feeling anxious, nervous suddenly, when Daryl's dark blue eyes met mine I waved, awkwardly, and scurried back inside the watch tower where I knew I couldn't be seen. Damn. Did it show? My hands were shaking, sweating. 

I'd always had this problem, never could look a good looking guy in the eyes, especially if I'd started get a crush. 

I shook myself off. Don't be stupid, Abs, it's a crush it will go.

I took a deep breath and headed back out. Daryl had gone, and Carl and Beth continued their own conversation. Beth punched Carl's arm and giggled girlishly, and I felt I was spying, so turned away. 

 

My 'room' had begun to take on a personal look. Over the few months I'd compiled books, a chair, a hurricane lamp. The chair stood by the bed as a side table and my meager possessions sat proudly on top. My photo of Ben, now framed, faced my bed, a half read book I'd already read a thousand times but love, lay open, pages down, between Ben and my lamp. On the wall a clock was hung. It didn't work but it was pretty. I had a watch that worked.

I also had a lovely vase, I don't know why. It was just unique and I liked having 'things' of my own. 

As I walked back to my little cell in this giant place I heard a creak of bed springs come from behind the makeshift curtain I'd hung in the doorway. Nobody likes to be exposed, but nobody liked to be locked in. I guessed that made sense. It was a prison first and foremost, but now it was sanctuary. It didn't fit for some people I suppose. I had just followed suit. 

I approached slowly, and stood behind the curtain, my hand on my hip, the handle of my knife there feeling rough and familiar. I reached slowly for the curtain with the other hand and drew it back fast, whipping my knife out of its sheath.

Daryl

"The hell are you doing in my room?" I asked as I caught my breath. He stood up, mumbled an apology, I think, and backed to the other side of the cell. I sat on my bed and instinctively ran my eye over my things. Ben's picture had moved slightly and was no longer facing my bed. I moved him back to where he should be and looked accusingly at Daryl. It wasn't hard to look him in the eye now, he had crossed a line. "Touching my stuff? I don't touch your things! What do you want?" Daryl actually had a little colour lift in his cheeks and I couldn't help but feel bad. I didn't mean to shout and get angry, but Ben was everything to me, now he was gone, his picture took his place. 

"He ya boyfriend?" I crossed my arms, knife sticking out at a peculiar angle,

"What do you want?" I asked again. Daryl rubbed his face and shuffled his feet again, clearly uncomfortable. 

"Founda place few miles out. Well stocked, but I need a car and some compney. Thought you might wanna get out. S'been a while" I sat on my bed after sheathing my knife. It would be nice to get out. It had been a few weeks since my last run. How did Daryl know I needed that space? How did he know I enjoyed sometimes just being out there with the walkers and the dangers, to keep my feet on the ground? I nodded but I felt like the wind had been knocked out of me.

"Sure" I said "when?" Daryl had shrugged

"Sooner the better" I nodded again

"Sure" I looked up, expecting Daryl to leave with no good bye or even a see Ya later, but he stood looking at his feet. Hands behind his back, leaning against the wall. I chewed the inside of my cheek and gestured at the photograph of Ben "my brother" I said, and Daryl looked up

"Oh" he offered. I picked up the framed photo and held it against my cheek, the picture facing Daryl 

"Twins" I said getting up and closing the distance between us "see?" Daryl looked, actually looked hard at me and then at Ben's likeness. His dark blue eyes bore into mine so hard I felt he could see my very thoughts. Up this close the flecks of gold and black were very clear.

He was beautiful

"Yeah. Same eyes" Daryl said quietly, roughly, and I was close enough to feel as well as hear the words come out of him. He stepped away then, towards the door "tomorrow Mornin" he said, and disappeared through the makeshift fabric door. 

* * *

 

 

I found him in the morning leaning against the truck. It was 7am and still just dark. Winter really was coming on fast.  He stared at his shoes as I approached him, only looking up as I reached to remove my pack. He took it from me and slung it in the back among his own and some fuel cans.  He took a map from his pocket and gave it to me.

"Place is circled, can ya navigate?" I took the map and mumbled my agreement through a yawn. He smirked at me and hopped in the driver's seat. I dashed around and clambered in beside him. 

"What is it?" I asked once we were out of the compound, staring at the map before me through a blur of sleep.

"Food store. Stocked well. Should sort us out for the winter" I nodded, mostly to myself as he kept his eyes on the road. 

"It's a long way. How long are we gone?" Daryl shrugged but offered nothing else. Another yawn shook me and a shiver chased it up my spine. An involuntary noise escaped me and Daryl leaned forward to turn on the heat. I smiled at him gratefully but he was glaring ahead.

 

The roads were scattered with cars and walkers but the farther we went, the fewer we saw. When the trees started to thin out, Daryl pulled over. I was a bit confused. He reached for the map, letting out a guttural "lemme see" so I let him have it

 

"We're going the right way" I said, a bit sullen. He nodded

"Yeah. There's some houses not far along here I just remembered. Might be somethin' useful" he gave me the map, but said I didn't need it now, he knew where he was going. I looked at his profile. This man of few words and too much hair. I was slightly uncomfortable in his presence still but my crush had somehow sated itself. He was a good looking rugged guy, for sure, but something had changed in me in my room the night before. He shouldn't have touched my things.  He looked at me sideways and smirked a little

"Ya like starin'," he looked back at the road "you stare a lot. You don't talk much." I let out a single syllable laugh

"Says you" he shrugged. 

"Yeah. Says me" the roads were starting to chog up again and we had to weave slowly around stalled, crashed or abandoned cars. A few walkers looked up as we passed but nothing to worry about. No need to stop and kill and possibly bring out more. 

 

"What happened to ya bro?" The question came out of the blue, sudden and unexpected. I didn't answer right away. I looked forward, as he did, and noticed the sun was in front of us. The sky lit with a yellow glow through the heavy grey cloud. Peeking around the edges the rays lighting everything they touched like the fingers of God. 

"Got bit" I answered, still staring at the beauty, not really seeing it anymore as ugly thoughts stampeded through my mind. "I was out, bathing. I came back to our camp to his screams. A walker had got in. One fucking walker. And he had his back turned."  I sniffed, was I crying? "I came back, got rid of the walker, but it was too late. Ben had half his shoulder missing." As I watched through the windshield the fingers of light faded as the clouds over took the sky. "He asked me to kill him."

  
_He was in so much pain, and I could feel it, the burning through his blood, the rage beginning in his head and the thirst. Twin thing. I'd never felt it so strongly before_.

I didn't tell Daryl this, he'd surely never understand. Maybe he'd laugh and call me dumb.

"I had to kill my brother" he said quietly, almost to himself "he got himself turned before I saw him, fucked me up, having to shoot him. Wasn't sure I could do it" 

I shook my head

"Wasn't like that for me. I knew I had to" I sniffed again. Daryl looked at me sideways, again. 

"Y'okay?" I nodded 

"It was tough, don't like to think about it" Daryl nodded, 

"Yeah" then he reached his right hand off the steering wheel and down on to my knee, giving it a soft squeeze. I stiffened slightly, but resisted the knee jerk reaction to pull it away. This was Daryl being comforting and understanding. A side I'd not seen outside of him feeding Judith. 

 

His hand was warm and heavy on me for the next few miles. 

 

We pulled over again by a row of maybe three or four houses, shacks really.They looked derelict, crumbling on the outside, over grown with ivy. The area was free of cars and walkers.

Daryl hopped out and grabbed his crossbow, I followed, unsheathed   the knife I kept forever at my hip. 

Daryl knocked on the door of the first house and I waited with baited breath beside him, listening hard. I bounced lightly on the balls of my feet, ready for fight or flight to take hold, ready for either, preferring the former. 

Daryl looked at me and motioned I follow him with a quick flick of his head. 

Inside the ivy and grime at the windows gave it a dank and dark look. Nothing like the houses in suburbs I'd scouted before. We moved forward as one, our breathing timed perfectly, our weapons raised just in case. A door to the left of the hall was shut and Daryl knocked on it as I split off right into a room whose door stood open. It was a kitchen. Despite the murk and crap on the windows it was lighter than the hall. I raced forward and opened the cupboards, hope rising ridiculously in my chest. Whenever I found something useful I felt so proud of myself. It was stupid, but it helped me to keep going when I was alone, and it made trips out like this that little bit more exciting.

"We clear the house first" Daryl said, right behind me, so close his breath moved my hair. The small short hairs on my neck stood on end as did the hairs on my arm. How did he get so close without me noticing? I shut the cupboard without looking inside and we moved through the shack room by room, coming up with no enemies, no threats. The whole place was kind of eerie in its silence and darkness, more so than on any run I'd been a part of before. 

Back in the kitchen I gave Daryl a look and he gestured I go ahead "get ya fill" and I opened the cupboards once more, hunting greedily for anything we could use. 

I filled my pack with canned fruit, and almost skipped out of the place despite the weight on my back. 

 

The next few houses were also clear but held nothing of use, which was a shame. I hated coming out empty handed.

 As we neared the last house I realise there was a smirk on Daryl's face. He never smiled fully, just lifted one corner of his mouth a touch. It was more a twinkle in his eye that let the secret out that he was smiling than it was his mouth. He caught me looking and I felt my face glow. The smirk didn't leave him but he turned forward and banged on the door as he had all the others.

I was shocked into the here and now by the groans that came from inside. Daryl put a finger to his lips and his ear to the door, listening hard. He pulled back and said

"No more'n one or two. Ya ready?" Was he kidding? Always! But I nodded and got into a slightly crouched stance as Daryl kicked the door down in a single blow. A walker tumbled backward but instantly moved forward again when the momentum gave up. It reached forward with bent fingers, it's mouth a red hole full of bloody teeth. Daryl grabbed it by the throat and I rammed my knife through its temple. Instantly it went limp and Daryl dropped it on the floor. He stepped over it and I followed, but looked back 

"Daryl it had blood in its mouth" he moved forward slowly, quietly, but said

"I know. It's just fed" and my heart sped up a little. What were we going to find half eaten in here? 

We moved forward as one again, almost silently, and noises came from our left. A room with a closed door again. Daryl frowned to himself and put his ear to the door. He shook his head and backed away. 

"Weren't here before" he said quietly, and though I knew what he meant, he'd been here previously, I didn't understand the implications. Walkers don't go around shutting doors behind themselves. 

"We'll check the house out, come back" he said to me then. So I followed him with my knife raised and my heart pounding, the sound of my blood rushing through my ears.

When we reached a set of stairs Daryl loudly kicked the bottom step and thumped the wall with the side of his fist. When nothing came straight away I relaxed. 

"Wait" he said beside me, having clearly felt my ease. It was a moment or two before the noise started. Not groans and moans, not the norm.

"Help who's there?" I took a step backward, stunned. Daryl looked at me, a finger to his lips, raised his crossbow, and began to take the stairs one at a time. I began to follow, but he shot me a look over his shoulder and I backed down the two steps I'd taken. 

 

I don't know who or what he found upstairs that day. I didn't ask and he never told me. I can only speculate the man who called down was bitten, and was going to die anyway. 

 

He came down the stairs and headed straight for the door we came across first. His face was set, angry. I just followed him, silently. He kicked the door down without checking I was ready and went to town on the walkers inside. There were three, he stabbed one with a bolt through the eye and threw it in the path of a second. As it stumbled over its kin he stamped on its head. With that done, and a third walker so close I jumped in the room and stabbed it through the skull with my knife. As it crumbled he again felt the need to stamp on its head. He seemed really pissed off. 

"You ok?" I asked as his strange pummeling of the dead slowed to a stop. He didn't answer, just grunted and moved out of the room. I followed, confused. He had his torch out and was shining it around what looked like a living room. I followed the beam until it stopped, having landed on a bookshelf. I looked at Daryl and his small smile had almost returned. I walked forward, Daryl followed

"Dammit where is it" he whispered almost softly, scanning the book case with his torch. I lightly fingered the books there, dust flying as I read the titles. I'd read most of them. But I loved books. The smell, the feel of them in my hands. Old books were best. I was drawn out of my day dream by Daryl exclaiming

"Here" and I looked at him. He had the torch in his mouth and something in his hands. He appeared to open what ever he had and pull out a piece of paper and threw it on the floor unceremoniously, closing again what ever it was in his hands. He pulled the torch out of his mouth and thrust the object at me. I turned it over twice before it dawned on me 

"A picture frame?" I asked confused. Daryl nodded

"Uh huh. Matches the colour in your cell... I thought it was nicer than the one you have" a smile spread on my face involuntarily, and without thinking of what I was doing I flew at Daryl and flung my arms around his neck

"Oh Daryl it's gorgeous, I love it" he was taken aback and stiffened at my touch. I pulled away sheepishly and looked the frame over again. It was green, and now I thought about it my room was predominantly green. It had butterflies in relief around the edge. I really did love it.

 

It still sits on my chair next to my bed. 

 

"Thank you" I gushed. I looked up at Daryl and he smirked

"S'ok. I'm sorry I touched ya things. Thought this was the best I could do as an apology" he'd seen it and thought of me. This hard, harsh, unfathomable man had seen something and thought of me. I wanted to hug him again. He smirked again at me, looking shy. I grinned wide and open at him, putting the frame in my pack. "We need to get onto the store" I looked at him again, had he brought me here just for this? 

"Daryl?" He looked behind him, having already almost left the room.  "Was this, all for a picture frame?" He shrugged and went to keep walking. I caught up to him and grabbed his arm. I tried to spin him around but I wasn't really strong enough. He turned anyway, and I looked deep into his eyes. "Was this all for a frame?" I asked again. He shrugged and smirked that infuriating smirk.

As far as I was aware he had been in my room once. The day before. Hadn't he?

"I know you like... Girly, pretty shit" I threw my arms around his neck again and headed to plant a kiss on his cheek, but he stiffened and moved at my touch and my lips landed directly on his. I froze, he froze, and then his arm wrapped around my waist and he drew me close, forcing my lips open with his mouth, tongue exploring mine. I opened my eyes and looked at him, stunned. His face was rough against mine, his tongue raked against my own. I moved against him and his arms pulled me tighter. 

 

This was crazy, out of the blue.

 

He pulled away and looked me over. My face felt raw, scraped half to death by his beard. 

"C'mon." He said "We need to get goin'"

 

* * *

 

We drove silently on, reaching the food store just before dark fell. Daryl parked the truck and pulled a face.

"I'd rather go in in daylight, you?" I looked out the windshield, the sun was dipping low and the sky blazed orange and pink at the horizon.

"Yeah" I said. "Where we gonna sleep?" Daryl looked around, then gestured between us.

"Grab our stuff inside, lock the doors" he raised an eyebrow at me then jumped out, grabbing our packs. I put my feet up on the bench seat and leant my back against the passenger door. When Daryl came back he put the gear in the footwell and pushed his own back against the driver's door

"C'mere" he said to me and I looked at him unsure. "Turn round, we stay close and keep warm" I narrowed my eyes but did as he asked, scooting up between his legs, my back against his solid chest, my butt against his groin. Suspicious, untrusting, and and once again clammy with nerves as my crush came rushing back to me. 

He wrapped his arms around me, just under my breasts and held me close to him. I rested my head on his shoulder and we sat a while in silence. I watched as the world grew dark around us, listened to Daryl breathing, but I wasn't comfortable. I moved his arms and shimmied back a little, as I did he grunted. I assumed he had begun to drift off.

"Sorry" I whispered, but as I did the arms beneath my chest moved and one of his hands found my thigh, the other cupped my left breast and the thumb rubbed over my nipple. I pulled in a sharp shot of air as the hand on my thigh began rub up and down slowly. 

"Daryl" I breathed, and he stopped.

"You wan it?" He asked, almost breathless himself. In reply I scooted my butt forward, bent my knees and lay back on to his stomach. I lifted my  butt off the seat and wriggled my combats down to my ankles. I grabbed his hand and placed it exactly where I wanted it. A calloused finger found its way through the thatch of tight curls and stroked my clit as Daryl's other hand reached up under my tshirt. I wasn't wearing a bra, I didn't every day anymore. His thumb now rubbed directly against my nipple, I took a sharp intake of breath as his rough skin scraped against the sensitive, slightly erect area. In response the finger between my legs moved faster and pushed against me harder. I let out a guttural noise and thrust my hips upwards. He pinched my nipple between his fingers and I cried out. I didn't know about him, but I hadn't been touched like this in a long time, and my nerve endings were already thrumming. 

I pushed his hands away from me and turned over. I grabbed his trousers and undid them, edging them down and exposing the fullness of his hard erection. I kicked my own trousers off my ankles and pushed his legs together with one of mine.

It was awkward, but I straddled him. No time for foreplay, I needed this too badly. I put one foot on the floor and bent my other leg beside his, against the back of the bench seat. I grabbed his shaft and eased him into the slickness of myself. He watched my every move and finally looked up as I lowered myself onto him. I wriggled and he let out another grunt. I grabbed his hand and spread his fingers on my belly, his thumb pushed again at the hair that had grown on my mound and found my pulsating clit again. I let out an oh and began to grind against him, his cock hitting all the right places, the roughness of his thumb feeling like heaven. As he grunted and groaned and began to thrust beneath me I moved faster against him. Bucking like a woman possessed. I let out my own groans as my nerves tingled and my toes curled. Daryl Moved his hands from me and grabbed my hips, pulling me back and forward on top of him. I felt him buck beneath me and I came undone in a noisy, sweaty mess. Fireworks went off in my gut as I tipped my head back and let go. Moments after my own orgasm Daryl's fingers curled tighter around my hips and he pulled and pushed me fast against him. My breasts bounced under my tshirt uncomfortably, but I wanted Daryl to get off.

"Come inside me Daryl" I whispered, and he moaned "I want to feel your hot come in my cunt" and it tipped him over the edge, he bucked again beneath me and his face contorted into a grimace. I felt him explode inside me, the warmth spread and spilled between us and he slowed to a stop. 

We stay where we were, breathing hard, steam and condensation on the windows, sweat on our skin. We caught each others eye, and both let out an awkward laugh. I don't think either of us expected this.

 

* * *

 

I woke in the morning fully dressed and curled in his strong arms, head against his chest. It was cold in the truck and I could see my breath. I wriggled and heard;

"Ya 'wake?" I nodded, not yet ready to speak. I leant down to the footwell and grabbed a bottle of water from my pack. It was cold, soothing against my sleep addled throat. I offered it behind me to him and he took it, taking a long gulp. His other arm didn't remove itself from around me and being in the arms of this man felt so safe and so right. I didn't want to dwell on it, we'd fucked in a moment of madness and it couldn't get in the way of today's true mission. We had to stock up on goods to get the prison and its inhabitants through a tough winter. 

Daryl handed back the water and I drank again, wishing I'd brought a thermos of coffee. Daryl unwound his arms from me and twisted to wipe the condensation from the window. It was light. I looked at my watch, 8am. 

The eerie stillness outside terrified me. In the past places like this I had come across had been full of walkers, but here there was nothing I could see or hear. 

"Do you think they're all inside?" I ask, moving away from Daryl and stretching. He grunts 

"Maybe. If there're too many we might need to come back with more people." I shook my head. We'd be fine. I was nimble, fast, and he was observant, cautious, and clever. Between us there was no reason we couldn't do this. "'K. I need to piss. Wait here" he got out the the truck and moved to the back wheel. I tried not to look as I heard him urinating. I'd had worse 'morning after' experiences... Hell at least he was still here. I smiled to myself and he got back in the truck, giving me a questioning look

"Just remembering, one night stands from before." His face dropped a little, so I didn't explain further. 

"We get in, get out, get back," he pulled my pack from the foot well and handed it to me. I pulled out the canned fruit and chucked it in the passenger footwell to make room for more goods. Then I pulled out a handgun, and threw the pack over my shoulder.

"Ready" I said, and jumped out. Daryl followed, tucking a gun in the back of his pants. 

 

* * *

 

Back at the prison I helped to pack away our horde, and when I turned behind me finally, Daryl was gone. 

 

I walked sullenly back to my room after a few hours, trying not to think about what had happened, what we had done in his truck. The way he felt beneath me, inside me.

I let out a shaky breath and pulled the little curtain back from my door, looking forward to putting Ben in his much nicer frame.

_There on the chair, in my little pretty vase, a bunch of wild flowers stood._

Well, he did say he knew I liked girly shit.

 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After their weird night of impromptu truck-sex, Abra tries to distance herself from Daryl, but he's not about to let her go that easily.

 Yeah, I knew she liked girlie stuff. She was a real girly girl but she had this edge.

 

She would punch you as soon as hug you if you put a step wrong. I like that. She's true to herself and don't put on no airs and graces. If you don't like her, it's your loss as far as she's concerned. 

Thing is, every one liked her. The confidence, the fact that she is just Abra and that is a constant and unchanging truth. 

 

Too much in this world is about trying to fit in, because you have to. If you are the odd one out in a group you are often overruled, a small clash on personality in a world so small becomes a big one.

Abra tells herself she don't care. She's like me that way. 

 

* * *

 

It was weeks before we got to really talk again, alone. 

I could sense he was trying to get close to me at meal times, but I busied myself with others, with conversations. I went out hunting by myself, which I loved to do, on horseback, the wind in my hair, time to breathe, to think. I didn't want to have to deal with him at first. I needed space. Time to separate our one night from my emotions. 

I wished I could think like a man.

But time would cure me. It always had before. It was tough, living together as we did, but by hunting, working, doing my time in the watch tower, I managed not to see him too much. 

Until.

I stood up at the tower, looking out with my rifle at my eye. 

Walkers walkers everywhere. 

They pushed and shoved against the fence line. Those that were impaled on the wooden traps still moved, but they were getting slower, arms waving heads moving, but as if under water.

The sun was beginning to set, the sky a blazing orange in the distance, behind the trees. I was thinking about heading in. The air was cold, and often now the mornings rose with a layer of thin frost on all the outdoor surfaces. Winter was definitely here.

Maggie had offered to take watch that night. I prepared to leave the tower, heading inside, grabbed my thermos, my book, the blanket I'd turned into a poncho. I stretched out my shoulders, squeaking as I did so.

I heard a small gruff laugh behind me, and I turned to see Daryl. 

"M'I interrupting?" He smirked at me. I looked away from his piercing stare. 

"No. I was just leaving my shift." I heard him move forward, shut the door.

"I told Maggie to take the night off" I looked up then. He leaned against the angled wall, relaxed, chilled out. My nerves were vibrating. Being close to him made me nervous, anxious I'd do or say something dumb, show myself up. Prove to him I was just a stupid girl with stupid emotions. 

Dammit, I was just getting over my crush again, and here he was, large as life and ten times as handsome as I remembered. I sighed.

"Why? You taking on the night shift?" Nonchalant, just act cool, I told myself. But my question was stupid. He was here to see me and I knew it.

"Thought maybe..." He paused and gave me a look that I couldn't read. I just looked back at him, feeling awkward. He pushed away from the wall and looked me up and down.

"In the truck" he continued, but paused again. I was getting frustrated. I knew he wasn't much for words but this was just painful.

"What are you trying to say, Daryl?" I asked, more anger in my voice than I intended. "Want me to go first?"

He looked at me again, then away, out of the small angled windows that surrounded us. Night was coming on quickly now and I hadn't brought a torch with me this morning. I sighed and took off the poncho, feeling hot and bothered in this small space with this silent, brooding, idiotic man. 

"Y'avoiding me" it wasn't a question, and he was right. I had been. He continued to look out across the grounds. I plonked myself down on the makeshift bed Glenn and Maggie had set up up here. 

"I didn't want to get too... To give you the Wrong idea. It's hard for me to separate sex and emotion" I couldn't look at him, I fiddled with the duvet, rolling the edge of it in my fingers. "I thought, maybe, it was just... Then the flowers..." I lay on my back and covered my face. Why was this so hard?

Daryl moved forward swiftly, softly, and lay beside me. I uncovered my face and saw him there, staring at the roof above us, his hands laced behind his head. 

"It didn't feel like just fucking" I finished with a sigh. When Daryl didn't answer I gave him a few more seconds. His profile was stunning, and I could have happily just watched him staring at the ceiling all night long. He put his hand to his face and chewed a little on his thumb. 

"The way we live now" he started, pulling his thumb away, "it can't be" I narrowed my eyes as he turned to me. "It ain't" he said softly in the final dim glow of the sun, now below the horizon. His eyes still shone, he was still beautiful, even in the dark. 

I wasn't expecting this. I tried to work out if he just wanted to get laid again or if he really didn't think that what we did wasn't a one off. 

On the one hand, living as we did, close quarters, barely able to get out of each others pockets, he was right, it couldn't be.

On the other, he was a man, a strong, gruff, brooding, muscly, handsome...

Oh crap! 

He watched my face as I thought, as I turned over in my mind all these things and tried to keep my ideas straight, not turning into and lingering on the fact that he was pretty hot. That screwing him was probably the worst thing I ever did didn't matter because, Well, before the walkers and the other monsters I could never...

I tried to focus and he smirked at me, like some kind of mind reader and I felt myself blush, thankful for the darkness.

All these cheeky smiles and knowing looks. I had to harden myself to him.

I hard to ignore those deep, dark, blue eyes, that cute little mole above his mouth, the way his hair hung in his eyes making him so mysterious. 

No. I had to get a grip

"What are you gonna do, Daryl?" I sat up, if only to distance myself from him. "Profess your undying love and sweep me off my feet?" I tried to keep my voice steady, stood up and walked away from him. The room there in the tower was becoming incredibly dark and I almost tripped over my rifle as I moved. I heard Daryl move on the bed behind me.

"I'm fine" I growled, wanting so much to be angry, but I thought I'd sprained my ankle.

"Abra" he said behind me, but I refused to turn to him. I'd come undone and I couldn't, not now. I'd started and I had to see this through. "Abra," I heard him get up and I sighed, dying a little inside as I betrayed myself and turned to him. He was moving towards me, the very last light twinkling off the buttons on his denim jacket. "No" he said "I ain't gonna tell ya I love ya. I don't." I frowned at him. "I do wanna get to know ya." I felt him take my arm in his big hand. "Ya know, when someone brings ya flowers, it's customary to say thank you"  I thought about pulling my arm away. I thought about slapping him, punching him even. 

Instead, I fell forward and crashed my mouth against where I imagined his to be. He stiffened, surprised, but soon melted into me and kissed me back. I raked my fingers into his hair and pulled slightly, positioning him where I wanted him. I found his tongue with my own and massaged it. 

I pulled away a little and bit his lip. Then we just stood in the darkness, staring at each other. Chests heaving, vapour pouring from our slightly open mouths. 

"Well shit" he breathed, and I stifled a giggle. "I didn't come up here..." I cut him off. 

"No. It's ok" I smiled at him, hoping he could at least see the flash of white that were my teeth, to know I had. 

"I ain't that guy" he mumbled. Turning away and finding the bed. "I ain't like that, I don't want you to think I'm gonna just attack Ya every now and then and expect ya to accept it" he cursed under his breath and I was stunned. He seemed angry, and I couldn't work out why. "I never was then and I ain't now" I went to him, sat next to him on the bed. I put my hand on his shoulder and he shrugged me off, turning to face me.

"Y'ok? You hobbled just now" I hadn't even noticed. "Here" he said,

When I didn't answer, and he grabbed my leg, gently, slowly removed my boot and my sock. I watched him think maybe we should have candles or something, this was incredibly intimate, incredibly sensual the way he touched me. 

He pulled a torch out of his pocket, switched it on and sharply breathed in through his teeth "it's swellin' up fierce" he put the torch in his mouth and took my foot in both his hands, resting my heel on his thigh. "Mmph" he muffled, jutting his chin at me, angling that I take the torch. I did so and he began to massage my foot and ankle. It felt like heaven, having lived in boots for so long. I tipped my head back and moaned, feeling him laugh as I did so.

"Oh Daryl you've no idea" I said my voice far away even to myself. It was heaven. I sighed and he stopped, put my foot down and placed a hand on the front of my shoulder. 

"What?" I began to ask, but he was gently pushing me back, and climbing on top of me has he did so. He spread my legs with his knee as his mouth found my neck and his weight held me down. He bit and sucked at my flesh and I felt him grow between my legs. He began to rub against me, a hand snaking it's way beneath my winter layers and into my bra. I arched my back and gasped as he sucked hard at my neck, no doubt leaving his mark, branding me as his. 

He edged down my body and hooked his fingers into the waist of my pants, I followed his lead and undone the button fly in double time. He yanked them off, right off, and fling the to the other side of the room. He placed a hand on each of my knees and buried his face in the dark nest of hair between them. 

I bucked involuntarily as his mouth found my clitoris and he sucked, hard. I moaned and squirmed as he sucked, and grazed his teeth against me. He slipped a finger into my already dripping cavern and I thrust against his face, covering my face with my hands to keep from crying out. 

"Ohhhh Daryl," I called, "please no more, I need you inside me" he continued to finger fuck me, eating my clitoris greedily, he groaned and grunted, the vibrations sending tingles all through me. "No, shit" I growled "I'm gonna come Daryl, please, I want your cock" instead he extended a third finger, I had no idea which one, and rubbed it against the cheeks of my ass. I inhaled in shock, but he persisted, and with the slickness of my juices acting as lube, he managed to slide it in-between. It was a new feeling for me, and it was amazing to feel so full, to have more than one of my fuck holes full of him. I raised my butt, he pushed his fingers in deeper, and I fell apart, coming hard on his hand, spilling a fast flow of female ejaculate on to his chin. I collapsed down on to the bed and pulled away from him, his hand falling away from me, his face lifting. I got up on my knees and kissed him, hard, my hands at his waist, his jeans  his belt. I couldn't free him quick enough. He stood before me and I took his length in my mouth, grabbed his ass and pulled him forward, his swollen pink head hitting the back of my throat. He groaned and began to thrust at my face. He hit the back of my throat again, firmer, and I gagged a little.

As I did I felt the ever recognizable twitch in him and my mouth was suddenly full of his hot come. I continued to suck on him as it pulsed out and into me. I swallowed it down and looked up at him with a smile. His cock already beginning to droop, still twitching where it hung. I pulled him to his knees in front of me by the hem of his jacket, and kissed him again, forcing him to taste himself in my mouth. Insisting he taste it. 

I pulled away and looked at him, the torch, now on the floor, lighting half his face

"Are you sure that's not why you came up for?" He didn't reply, just gave me that irritating little smirk.

 

* * *

 

When I woke up in the morning I thought, just for an instant, that I was at home, in my double bed. I stretched and opened my eyes to the bright light coming in through the window beside me. I could hear kids playing in the street outside, squealing and chasing. 

Then it struck me. The cold tower, ice on the windows, thick and hazy. The bright light coming from a torch beside the bed we must have left on, falling asleep instead of having our wits about us and saving the batteries.

We

Daryl was no longer in the bed with me. I sat up, turned off the torch and grabbed my watch. 

8am. 

He must have left on some errand or another. I listened to the sound of the kids, but it wasn't kids, it was the pigs in the little pen Rick, Hershel and Carl had built. My fuzzy mind couldn't grasp the fact that the pigs didn't normally squeal so much as grunt at their morning feed. 

I stood and saw Daryl standing on the ledge outside. But it wasn't Daryl, it was Ben in Daryl's leather vest, Rifle up to his eye, stock still in the winter sunshine. I stood and edged out toward him, I was half naked, so I wrapped the bed sheet around myself. I noticed the rifle he held was pointed at the farmyard animals the group had domesticated before I arrived. 

"Ben?" A feeling of dread washed over me, and I knew it wasn't him. Not really him. I peeked over the edge from where I stood and the field below was awash with blood, without turning towards me I heard the Thing before me say in Ben's voice

"C'mere" and it reached a hand back towards me. I screamed, loud and piercing, looking at Ben's hand half rotted in front of me, the skin sallow and hanging from the yellowed old bones. It turned its face toward me, green/gray flesh, The hole in his temple where I'd shot him large and crawling with maggots, his eyes sunk back into his head.  "Wake up!" The Ben/Daryl thing yelled "Wake up Abra!"

My eyes flew open to the dark and cold watch tower. I was covered In sweat from head to toe and Daryl's face was inches from my own.

"Abra?" He sounded shaken. "You were screaming in ya sleep, y'ok?" I nodded slightly, and looked at him, into him. I grabbed his face with my hands and held him by the cheeks, checking he was real.

"I woke up, but was dreaming" was all I could articulate, so pleased I was that the nightmare was over. Daryl took my hands in his and lowered them from his face.

"What happened?" I looked at him and shook my head, the dream already dissipating. I grabbed my watch from beside the bed, and tried to tell the time. Either 20 past midnight or 4 am. Either way I didn't care to make sure which hand was bigger than the other. Either way it was too early to be awake. 

"Ben" I said then "You were Ben, but Ben was... one of them" I gestured to the window, to the outside, to the walkers, The Assholes who constantly stood at the fence, clawing and groaning, and hoping for food. Sure, they were put down on a regular basis, but more kept coming. 

"Ben's dead" Daryl said then, softly, reassuringly. How strange in this world that dead, truly dead, was better than the alternative. How odd that this calmed me and lessened my heart rate. I nodded. I'd killed him myself. "I used to see my brother, sometimes," he continued. "We lost each other, and I used to see him, right in front of me like he was there" His eyes went distant as he remembered. I knew enough not to interrupt him. He went a little quiet and I let him, my hands still in his, held softly but firmly in his lap. "I wish I coulda said goodbye" He looked at me "He was already one a them, I never got the chance, The last thing I said to him was 'I Want my brother back'. I'm eatin' my words now. " he dropped my hands and stood up. "At least ya got to say goodbye" Was he angry with me? I had been drifting to sleep again to his whispers, as he dropped my hands I shuddered to fully awake. 

"I returned to our camp because I felt something was wrong. Ever heard of twin thing?" Daryl looked down at me, face hard, and shrugged "It's when Twins have an almost psychic ability with each other. I didn't know what was happening but I knew something was wrong. As I held him, as he lay in my arms begging for death, I could _feel_ what was happening inside him." I lay back again, stared at the ceiling I could barely make out in the darkness "I got to say goodbye, that's true. I also got to feel what it's like to be bitten, what it's like to have that burning raging fever, I felt every moment of his suffering" And frankly, I thought, you are not gonna take that away from me just because I got to say goodbye.  Daryl didn't reply, just stood in the dark looking down on me, face no doubt still firm in its frown. "You can never know what it's like." I continued, not enjoying the heavy atmosphere the silence between us created. "You will never understand, and don't try to assume that saying goodbye made it better" I was crying, tears rolling down either side of my face, collecting on the pillow beneath me.  I missed Ben every day, every moment without him was like being torn in half all over again. Like someone had removed my left arm, and my left leg. I could survive, but it was so damned hard.

Daryl continued his silent stare and I sat up again.  "There's a reason I don't talk about this" I raged. I got up and began collecting my things in the dark, I looked at my watch again and noticed it was now definitely 04:20. 

"Ya runnin' away? Ain't gonna make it easier" He said, his voice still a whisper, but rough, and harsh. More accusations. 

"No, but at least I wont have to be told that it's ok my brother is dead, that I don't know how _poor Daryl_ feels because he never got to say goodbye."

"That ain't what I said" I shook my head at him, fully dressed, my belongings in my hands.

"It's written all over your god damned face. You don't have to say a word" I stormed past him, flung the small pack over my shoulder and began to descend the ladder in to the prison grounds. My ankle tried to give up on me but I pushed on regardless. I wasn't about to cry out in pain and ask for help. I wouldn't give the greasy redneck hick the satisfaction of rescuing me again. As far as I was concerned he could go to Hell and stay there.  I looked out at the surrounding fences as my feet hit Terra Firma. One or two assholes were standing there, leering at me in their gormless, hungry way. "You can fuck off as well" I hissed at them as I walked past.   

* * *

 

Inside the walls of the prison we are safe.

Inside the compound, away from the threat of walkers and people.

That's what I kept hearing. Safe. 

I didn't feel safe with Abra. She burned, she tortured, she broke my heart, over and over again. 

I don't know how she did it, I won't ever know. This random ass girl who turned up and took over the very core of me. Just when I thought I had her figured out she'd get defensive and aggressive. Maybe because I struggle to say what I really mean. She got the wrong end of the stick, or took my words back to front. I dunno. We just kept stumblin' into bed together, then stumblin' into a fight. 

I'd never tell a single person, but when she left me standin' in that tower, left me with her harsh words and misunderstandin' what I said, I was more scared than I have ever been. Because it hurt, it physically hurt that I had upset her. That's when I thought, maybe, this was something I had to fix, and she was someone I had to keep to close, and protect. 

She had no idea, but I think I knew more then about what she went through with her bro'.

I cried for Merle, but what had I lost, really?

It was nothing like the feeling of having Abra slip through my fingers


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> More weeks pass, and Abra's anger fades, but when she catches Daryl watching her, she wants to let rip.
> 
> She doesn't get the chance.

I sighed and looked in the mirror above the sink in the communal shower room. The hickey on my neck was fading from a purple-red to an ugly brown. It had lasted a lot longer than I'd hoped, this weird branding left by Daryl on my neck. It had started the size of a dollar coin, and was in the stupidest place a jacket collar didn't quite cover.

I'd made a scarf out of some material I had found and that just about did the trick. No one asked questions or gave me knowing looks, at least.

I turned away from the mirror, my toothbrush and razor in my hand.

I was no longer furious, but I was happy not to be spending time with Daryl. It was easier to be apart than it was to be together. Calmer. I missed him, but it was getting better, day by day.

I headed out on horseback, I went out almost everyday now. The need for distance and me time had got stronger since mine and Daryl's argument. I'd barely seen him, and I kept telling myself that it suited me fine.

I pushed the heel of my foot into the bay mare's groin and loosened the makeshift rope reins a little. She moved effortlessly into a canter. She'd been looked after in her previous life, someone had loved her before the group had taken her in. It showed. She was amazing, and my pick of the horses. The kids called her Rainbow but to me she was an Isis, Aphrodite, a Venus.

My hair flew behind me and the wind was cool and crisp against my face. We reached the lake where I often sat and let her drink, where I thought about bathing but didn't dare to in the cold.

I watched the water, still and calm, sitting on the bank and thinking about Daryl. His dark blue eyes, always mean, always so hard, his outer shell lying to the world that he didn't have feelings, that he didn't care _"'bout nothin'"_

The oaf

I wondered if he had followed me today. He did sometimes, and he didn't think I knew.

I looked around myself and decided to bite the bullet. I mean, people in Sweden rolled around in the snow, right?

 

* * *

 

 I paused at the point where Abra had pushed the mare into a canter. Same spot, every time. I wondered if she realised just how predictable she was. I wondered if the mare would canter here now out of habit.

She'd gone to the lake again. Dear habit forming Abs.

I liked to follow her, make sure she was safe. She was avoidin' me again, that was ok at first, I'd pissed her off, I could let that go.

But out here, on her own, where monsters walk among men? No. Not alone. Not while I could still follow.

 

* * *

 

 I heard him coming. Being alone had taught me the difference between the lumbering, drunken stumbles of the undead and even the lightest foot steps of the living. The mare's ears twitched and I knew it was him, again. I guess I should have been flattered, but in truth it was getting annoying. If he wanted me so much, just come and talk to me. 

But then, he was so rubbish at facing his emotions, voicing them, and letting the truth , the deep real truth, come out and extinguish the blazing hot headedness he put out as a front. 

I stood and quickly pulled my layers off, not wanting to lose my nerve. I contemplated leaving my underwear on, for a moment, before reaching behind my back and unclasping my bra. My nipples stiffened painfully as the straps ran down my arms.

The mare snorted at me as if I was insane, and I had to agree. 

I stood naked, cold, and free. It was liberating to be completely nude in the icy chill of the winter. I folded my clothes and wondered how I might dry myself off after my swim. 

No time for that now, I was half way there. 

I edged forward and dipped a toe in the lake, wondering what the hell I was doing, what I was trying to prove. Knowing Daryl was watching changed me, but this was stupid. I'd no idea how deep or cold the water was. 

Too late to turn back, I moved slowly forward. I caught my breath as the water enveloped me. My skin tightened and my muscles constricted. Water lapped against my calves and I moved forward purposefully, ensuring one foot landed directly in front of the other as I moved, making my ass swing. I was mad at him, but putting on a show, my mind a turmoil of hating him and wanting him

I had no idea what I was doing and every idea all at once. 

 

* * *

 

I considered turning away. I almost did, but as her feet hit he water I was mesmerised. The soft, flowing, curve of her ass swinging seductively from one side to the other. Her sun kissed skin, even in the winter, glowing and smooth. I heard her gasp as the water edged up towards her thighs. 

A groan escaped me as she turned in my direction, stretched her hands above her head, tits pulling up and together. I felt dirty, perverted, but I couldn't draw my eyes away from her slightly too thin figure. 

 

* * *

 

I heard him moan, deep and low but loud in the silence. I turned in the direction I assumed he'd be, being watched, it was exciting. I cupped my hands in the water, now up to my waist, and tipped it over my chest, arching my head back, elongating my neck. I heard a rustling, the mare softly whinnied. I ran my hands down my neck, over my breasts, and into the water where he couldn't see. I wondered when it would get too much for him, when he might emerge.

I thought about whether I was just teasing, or if I had finally given in. 

No matter what I did or how I tried, I couldn't get away from him. 

I ran my hand over my freshly shaved pussy. Why did I do that? Why, if I was so sure I was getting over him, had I shaved for the first time in years? The smoothness felt good under my fingers, I tilted my head and closed my eyes, a finger delicately toying with my slit, pushing apart the fleshy lips and finding the nub of nerve endings there. Momentarily forgetting Daryl, I got lost in myself. 

 

* * *

 

Her lips parted slightly and her body writhed a little in the water not long after her hands disappeared. Though the water was clear I couldn't see what she was doing, but I weren't so ignorant to not know. 

My cock strained against my jeans as one of her hands reached back up and grabbed at her nipple. I couldn't look away, as much as I thought I should. 

She threw her head back and a smile danced on her face. I pulled at the crotch of my jeans, now uncomfortable to the point of pain. This needed dealing with, now. 

I watched her carefully, sliding the zip down, undoing the button. This was wrong, bad, but that just made me want it more. I eased my cock out of its shackles and rubbed my hand over the head, already sticky with precome.

"Filthy bitch" I whispered under my breath, as I watched her writhe and move, lost in herself. 

I grabbed my shaft and gently pumped my hand up and down, as I did so I twisted my hand, cork screwing my dick as I watched. 

I heard her gasp and catch her breath, I watched as her body shuddered, not with cold but with pleasure. My hand moved faster of its own volition. A long moan exited her lips and as I watched her come in the water, my balls twitched and I felt my own orgasm building, felt the rush through my organ before it pulsed and spurted onto the forest floor.

I shuddered, unsure if I had called out, for the moment my mind a blazing white hot blank. 

 

* * *

 

I didn't mean to make myself come. I didn't mean to go that far. 

I heard him cry out shortly after I did and I was suddenly embarrassed and furious. I moved forward towards the bank and climbed out of the water. The mare stamped her foot but I paid her no mind. Without pausing to dress, my skin a mass of goosebumps, I stormed to where I now knew him to be. He was standing, fully dressed, o thought for a split second perhaps he hadn't... But I noticed the White globs of

spent semen around his feet. 

"Good grief Daryl" I said, and he looked away.

"Like you din't know" he huffed at me. Stunned I gaped at him.

"It's not like I extended an invitation"

He refused to look at me. His face was flush, a mix of exertion and a crimson blush. I crossed my arms and he had the audacity to Stare briefly at my chest. I was freezing, shivering. I stormed away from him and threw my poncho over my naked body, grabbed my socks and boots and threw them on, too.

He stamped out beside me, face a contortion of fury

"Don't you dare be angry at me" I said, standing "you followed me, violated my privacy" he wrapped his thumbs into the strap of his crossbow and just looked at me, still angry, eyes narrow and fierce. The mare whinnied and we both looked to her. 

Something was wrong. 

 

* * *

 

I was furious at being caught very nearly red handed, but at the same time, I was still angry she was out here alone. I watched her brush the leaves and mulch from her feet 'n pull on her footwear before followin'. She sat there, nothin' on but a too short poncho, coltish legs reachin' as far as my eye could see. Then I was angry at myself, I wasn't the type to get so carried away by women. How she was doin this to me I still din't know. 

The horse cried out then, a high agitated sound. I span to see what was upsettin her so much, she sensed somethin' and I knew 'nuff to trust her. Animals just know. 

"Shit" I heard Abra breathe beside me, and my eye caught movement on the other side of the lake.

Walkers.

"Now look what ya did" I said to her, I felt her eyes glowering into my back, "they're far enough away for us to get a head start. How stable's that mare?" But Abra was moving already, tuckin her underwear and other clothes into her pack, throwin her pack on her shoulder. 

"I've no idea, we've not come across any" I nodded

"Aight. I suggest you go, then, 'for they get too close" 

"I suggest you stop telling me what to do" she countered, before untying the reigns on that damned pony and cracking her hand on its thigh "go home Girl" she yelled, whacking it again. The horse reared n span n ran off into the unknown. 

 

* * *

 

"Ya jus put that hoss to death" Daryl growled, but he misunderstood

"Better her than me" I growled back. He thought a moment, then nodded slightly. 

"What now?" He asked. I watched the walkers across the lake a moment before opening my mouth to reply. They were paying us barely any attention, until a rustle behind me caught theirs and ours. Daryl span, raising his crossbow to his eye in some magic slight of hand, and I span, realising suddenly that my weapons were not to hand, feeling immediately both vulnerable and stupid. I edged back so that Daryl was standing slightly ahead of me as the leaves nearest began to move. I caught my breath as a long, thin, white leg poked out, then a second, followed by a white neck, head, and huge antlers.

A white hart.

I'd heard about them, but never imagined I'd ever see one. It was beautiful and majestic, but it's eyes were wide in fear.  I moved forward and touched Daryl's bicep.

"No" I said softly "Drop the bow Daryl, we can't eat that" He grunted at me but didn't lower the weapon. Didn't even move for a moment. But I'd heard the myths about white hart's, and I wasn't about to watch Daryl bring us a horde more bad luck, "If you kill that deer, we're all in for a world of trouble"  I rolled my eyes though he couldn't see, and the deer just stood there and stared back at us. "That deer is sacred, and a clear sign that some bad fortune is coming, if you kill it you just anger the gods of doom" Daryl snorted, but I reached in front of him and put my hand on the bow. I pushed with a slight force and he lowered it finally.

"you believe that shit?" He said, deflated that he let me stop him. The deer's ears twitched, and it crept forward a little more. The movement attracted the attention of the walkers, and now their groans could be heard floating across the still cool water.

"There's a group of walking dead behind us Daryl. You don't believe it?" He grunted in reply and the deer's ears twitched again, then it bolted past us, and Daryl raised his crossbow again, in a fluid movement that blurred before my eyes. Another rustling came from the trees before us, and all hell broke loose.

 

* * *

  

I knew she was talkin', but I barely heard the actual words she said. I knew somethin' was comin'. I felt it before the Buck did. I was about to call out, tell her to go, but the deer bolted, and it was too late. The trees began to move again, and Abra muttered curses under her breath. 

Walkers, a shit ton of 'em, came limping out before us. Abra dropped her pack and slid across the floor to her machete, grabbing her gun on the way, but here was no way we'd clear all these bastards. They turned towards her, her sharp fast movements grabbin their attention, I heard her stand and a string of expletives tumbled from her lips. 

I backed away from the horde in front of us, and chanced a look her way. The issue was clear, she'd scraped her knees to shit slidin across the floor like a goddamned soccer player. Blood dripped down her legs in long, thin, red rivers. The geeks approachin sped up at the smell of it, her movements, her noise, her blood, all interestin 'em more than we needed. She wielded her Machete in front of her and backed away, breath coming in sharp bursts. Eyes dartin between them, the area around her, and me. 

I began to pick off what I could, but I was light on bolts. My hunting knife was at my side, but getting too close was suicide when there were so many.

Abra's leg came up in front of her, and kicked out at a perfect right angle with her body, pushing the lead walker into the others behind it. They stumbled, the ones at the very back falling like dominoes, but panic was written all over her face, and more of the dead were coming through the trees. I sprang forward towards her, and she lost focus. Her bright green eyes finding mine. Her mouth moved as if she were talking, but no words came out. I skirted the reaching arms of a rotten corpse and grabbed Abra by the arm, jerking her away from the stretched fingers of another. They grabbed at her hair as it flew behind her, and she yelled in pain as they clasped, and yanked handfuls out by the root.

 

* * *

 

As Daryl twisted me out of reach the walkers sped up, and seemed to lunge for us. I'd never seen so many and I almost froze in fear. Fight or flight just going right out the window as I stared down easily 50 rotten corpses. 

"My pack" I managed, as a walker tore at my hair, but Daryl wasn't stopping, wasn't turning back. What I really meant was my hunting knife, a gift from Ben on our 23rd Birthdays, it was pretty, and girly, and badass, all at once and I loved it.

Gone, forever, under the lazy feet of what appeared to be a growing horde of the dead.

"MOVE" He yelled in my ear, and I came back to myself, ran with him towards the trees, though I didn't know where we were headed, how we'd escape.

He must have been here before, fate never looked kindly on anyone anymore, but there, beyond the trees where we ran, over a clearing, a little copse of trees stood, and between them, a hut of some description. We were too far to make it out exactly, but my legs suddenly came alive. Appearing to pump of their own volition I sped towards the building, Daryl still gripping my arm.

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you guys so much for reading, following, leaving Kudos, it means the world that someone is enjoying my writing. I'm loving writing this.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abra and Daryl reach safety after the herd chased them from the lake, but all shacked up and half naked...  
> What could possibly happen now?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading, I appreciate it so much  
> Xx

* * *

I shouldered the door of the shack open and ushered Abra inside. She dashed forward, looking around the room with wide, glazed eyes. She dropped the weapons she still Had hold of to the floor with a clatter, and I wondered if the gun's safety was on. Then she tore, at the fireplace, ripping the mantel from the wall in a show of strength I think even surprised herself. I checked on the walkers, far nuff, for now, and losing interest. Abra threw the mantel at me, and then disappeared into the unknown darkness of the hut.

* * *

 

My side was a hotbed of fiery pokers, stabbing me and stealing my breath. I couldn't speak, I could barely think through the pain, but we needed to secure the door. I launched the mantel towards Daryl and went off in search of nails, a hammer, anything that would help hold the door shut so I could stop pretending I was ok. I found some antique furniture, a table and chairs. I picked up a chair and began to beat it against the floor. A satisfying crack shattered through my head and the back legs split from the seat.

* * *

 

I hammered the nails into the mantel at the door with Abra's gun, and Abra threw the old broken bits of chair into the fireplace as kindling. There were already logs beside the fire, so much for the White deer being a bad luck charm.

She stood staring at the fire, and I wondered how I should approach her. She needed checking for scratches, for bites. She'd had a very close encounter with some of those walkers. Too close. What I would do if I found somethin, I dint know. "Abra?" She didn't acknowledge me, just watched the flames, arms folded, standin stiff and slightly bent to her left. I approached her and looked at the flames with her, dancin n licking hungrily at the wood she'd fed em with. "Need to check you over" I said.

"We have no food, we've got no water." She looked at me "I've got no clothes, what the hell are we gonna do?" Her face was wet with tears and I wanted to reach out to her, comfort her, but I dint know how, dint know where to start.

"We'll be aight" I managed, hoping I was convincing, but she huffed and turned away, hugging herself tighter.

"I'm not bit, I didn't get scratched" she said softly. "I think I might be bald, but I'm not infected" her voice became bitter with that last. Infected. She turned to me again. "What would you do, if I was?" Her chin jutted out and she looked so defensive with her eyes blarin n her arms crossed. I just looked back. "You put me down?" She asked, and I had to force myself not to look away.

"Yeah" my voice wavered the slightest bit. "In a heartbeat" her eyes narrowed and she looked away from me back to the fire.

"That easy" she spoke almost to herself, a statement, not a question. I wanted to explain, tell her yeah, cause it wouldn't be her, it would be better for us both, but the words wouldn't come, so we just stared into the fire, side by side, in a heavy overbearin silence.

* * *

 

I tried not to analyse what he had said. In a heartbeat. It rang in my ears though, rattled around my head and mocked me. Daryl says what Daryl says because he's bad with words. That's all. He doesn't want you dead, he'd probably wrap you in your poncho and carry you so gently to a specially dug hole and lay you in with grace and compassion... I snorted. Don't analyse it, Abra. It is what it is.

"I got the wood out the kitchen" I turned my back to the fire, warming the back of my legs. "Might be some tins, maybe even some water" I shrugged.

"I'll go" he said in his deep, dark, gruff way, and he turned and left the room. I breathed a sigh of relief as he did. Relaxed a little. The tension between us felt like a solid thing, heavy, foreboding. Perhaps it was just me, making too much of things in that irritating way I had, overthinking everything and analysing every word he said. I didn't want to think about anything else. "Found a water butt" Daryl walked back in the room, topless but for his vest, his denim jacket in is hands. "Filterin the water through my shirt." He shrugged and stood next to me "might take a turn or two but we have water." I nodded, desperately trying not to look at him, not wanting to fall foul of my treacherous mind. "...ya legs" shit, he was talking. I looked at him, at his face, half covered by hair, his eyes narrow, dark. He tilted his head at me and I came back to myself.

"My legs?" He nodded,

"Don't wan em to get infected. We'll save some water, clean em up" I nodded back

"Yeah. Ok" I looked around, sat down on the floor, rearranged the poncho, which was too damn short. I sighed, "we here for the night?" Daryl looked down at me and nodded, a small smile playing at the corner of his mouth. I huffed out air at him. "I'm still mad at you for following me," his face changed, and he sat down beside me. He was frowning.

"Why? I saved ya life" I laughed, a single syllabled sarcastic ha. He frowned deeper.

"If you weren't there, I'd have left by the time they came" I stretched my legs out in front of me. "And I'd still have my hunting knife. My hair would be intact." I looked at him "why did you follow me?" He shrugged. I waited for a real answer, but none came. "Half an hour ago I had clothes, a horse..." I counted on my fingers.

"Half hour ago you were rubbin one out in the lake" he cut me off, and I just looked at him. What could I say? It was true.

A walker bobbed past the window and I froze. They'd caught us up.

"They scattered a bit. Just keep Ya voice down" Daryl whispered. I settled back down. Crossed my legs in front of me. The poncho just barely giving me some dignity. Not that it mattered. Not that anything mattered. I sighed

"Ok." I looked down at my legs. "Ok" I said again, not entirely sure what I planned to say. I fiddled with the edge of my poncho "if you wanted to come out with me you could've asked" he chuckled next to me

"Would ya've said yeah?" I shrugged

"Why? Why're you acting like its nothing and then following me around?" I looked up from the now curled hem of my poncho. Daryl was just looking at me. He shrugged and looked away

"Gotta make sure ya come back in one piece" I looked down at my legs again. Unfathomable.

"But if I got hurt you'd shoot me in the head, easy as that." He got up then, fast, and headed out of the room. I followed, quick as I could with sore knees and half naked. His shirt was in two pieces. I saw now, and he started pouring the semi filtered water through the second half.

"You shot ya brother" he mumbled, not looking up from his work.

"I don't talk about that" I said curtly. What the hell? Bringing my brother into this again?

"Why?" Still working at the shirt, the water, concentrating hard, or appearing to.

"Why'd I shoot him or why do I hate talking about it?" I Asked, confused. Where was this going?

"Both" he grunted, stopping finally and turning to me. I looked him in the eye, arms folded, poncho riding up my thighs, as I was all too aware, but he held my gaze.

"Because I didn't want him to become one of them, and it hurts too much to talk about" he nodded, thoughtfully.

"How'd it feel?" He asked then and I wanted to hit him, stop him asking these awful questions.

"You know how. I told you how Daryl." I could feel it now. Just thinking about it. His big green eyes looking up at me, begging without a word. My gun limp in my hand, trying to turn away but he forced me not to. The burn. My blood feeling it might boil out of my skin. Daryl nodded and turned back to the water filter system.

"I'd put you down in a second" he said quietly. "Not cause you don't matter, but cause you do" I felt the energy, the fight, drain from me. Literally, from head to toe, my whole body relaxed, inch by inch and muscle by muscle. "You're..." He stopped, turning "you're in my head, and I don't know why, I don't care why." He looked me up and down. "And Ya standing there in nothin but a flimsy short blanket and all I can think is how I coulda lost ya, not how ya half naked with legs up to here"

* * *

 

I wasn't shouting, but I was frustrated and confused. Why din't she get it? I'd been so clear. I thought it was so obvious. I'd never felt like this, never wanted to. But she'd done this, got in my head like no other woman and wheedled her way into my every thought.

"When?" she was saying "how?" I din't know. I shrugged. Shook my head and turned away. The water was ready, and she had those cuts.

"Don't matter when or why. It just...is" She walked out the room, and I followed with a bowl of water, a clean piece of my shirt. She sat by the fire again and I began cleanin her legs without a word. She watched as I soaked the rag, wrung it out, bathed her knees one by one. It was an easy, simple silence. Nothin hung unsaid, Nothin lingered on the tips of our tongues. It was just quiet.

* * *

 

It's oddly sensual to be washed by someone else. There wasn't even the slightest hint of sexual tension in his touch, just care.

Gently he washed the drying blood from my limbs, carefully he blotted away the dust and the dirt from the cuts I'd made skidding to my weapons. I thought again of my hunting knife and sighed. Just another piece of the past, gone forever. I realised Daryl had stopped caressing my legs and I looked at him.

"Ok?" He asked and I sighed again, shaking my head.

"I left my knife behind. It was in my pack." I looked down at my clean wet legs "Ben bought it for me, and now it's gone" I scrubbed at my face with my hands. "Is there any food? I'm so hungry" Daryl got up and went to the kitchen, coming back with a tin of beans and two tins of spam. "Spam!" I yelled and held my hands out for it. He tossed a can in my direction and sat down opening the tin of beans with a rusty old can opener, eating them cold with his fingers. I shuddered at the sight of him and went off in search of a fork.

* * *

 

Abra nestled against my legs and fell asleep as I sat and stroked her hair. The fire was dyin and needed fuel, but movin would disturb her. She needed her sleep after her ordeal that day, and she was so deeply asleep she was very softly and quietly snorin.

It made me feel good that she felt safe nuff with me, that she was secure in my company despite the world we lived in now. In the old world, the time before, I don't think she woulda give me the time of day. She was fiery, sure, but she weren't like the girls who showed interest in Merle and me, dirty, full of viruses and diseases, 4 kids clingin onto em, each with a different daddy.

Walkers went past the windows, sometimes one at a time, more often in smaller groups, none had yet attacked the door we'd secured, but I weren't holding my breath, anythin could change and catch their attention. We was just lucky they'd split up some.

I'd never felt like this before. Sitting strokin her hair? I never wanted to do that with no one before. Hangin out with Merle musta made me hard, uncarin, but now he was gone, and I could feel myself changin. I din't always agree with the things he did, but I couldn't stop it. Now I could. Now it was jus me and I din't have to be like him anymore.

I felt myself driftin off, but with so many walkers, scattered or not, it was a bad idea for us both to sleep. It was my call to keep her safe. It's what I wanted and no one was there to tell me not to. I lifted her head off my lap and lay her gently on the floor, decidin to feed the fire as the Mornin was gonna be a cold'n. Ice was already formin' on the windows of the shack. Abra curled herself up into a ball mumblin' bout somethin I couldn't make out. I loaded up the fire n wondered about getting back to the prison. They'd know we were together and I'd have that to deal with when we got back. Unless I took back some meat. That damn buck woulda gone down well. But he'd long gone, and any animal worth anythin woulda run when the walkers came. But the walkers were goin'. I made up my mind to make sure Abra was safe, n maybe go huntin before we went back. It'd be a long walk with no clothes on for her, but that was her dumb choice. I laughed to myself and threw another log on the fire.

"What's funny?" I heard behind me, her voice small and clouded with sleep.

"I din't mean to wake ya." I turned to her and she was still layin' all curled up, her home made poncho barely coverin her ass, she sat up and stretched.

"You didn't. You should sleep" she stood up yawning and joined me by the fireside. Then I felt her twine her fingers around mine and we was standin there holdin hands. Just standin there, lookin at the fire like a coupla teenagers at a bonfire party. It struck me that I never had that. As a kid, that girlfriend who hung around all summer when I was 15... Merle's reputation passed down to me I guess. As a kid girls weren't interested. Werent interestin neither if I'm honest, but was that me or Merle?

I was itchin to move away from her, rip my hand from hers and sit down to sleep, but I didn't. I stay there a while until she turned to me and ordered me to go rest

* * *

 

He protested a bit at first, but eventually curled up where I had. I don't know what made me take his hand, and now it tingled with the memory of our touch. I flexed my fingers and just watched the flames. I didn't want to watch the windows, the door. I didn't want to see those creatures which had chased us from the lake. Those creatures which had changed everything over the last year. And so much more had changed than just where and how we lived, our very thoughts were affected. Life turned on its head by an illness with which we are all afflicted, but which only recently took hold of us.

I crouched and hugged my knees. Sitting in this hut in the middle of nowhere. Maybe this had once been someone's holiday home or hunting shack, so close to the woods and the lake, and we barge in, break up the furniture for a fire and raid the cupboards for food without a thought. I would have horrified my former self. Pre apocalypse Abs was a whole different person. Maybe she was naive, maybe she was immature. Either way she was gone. Post apocalypse (or is it classed as during?) Abs was a different entity. Sultry, moody, more frugal, more open to the ideas of others.

I flexed my fingers again. They almost felt like Daryl may have left a mark on them. I looked at my palm, and of course saw nothing.

 _Because you do matter_ , he had said. _Not because you don't but because you do_. I smiled to myself. You matter Abra. You matter to someone. I never thought I would matter, ever again.

I looked over at Daryl, curled up on his side, denim jacket back on, leather vest under his head. He mattered, too. But he didn't need me for that. He mattered to his group. He mattered to the newcomers at the prison. They loved him, they needed him. To think he might need me would have been laughable just a couple of months ago, when he spoke to me in single words sentences. When I hid from him in my makeshift teepee, alone, frightened, but ready to fight him and Glenn and their weapons.

Scratching at the door distracted me from my thoughts. Walkers, maybe just one. If there were one or two they'd move on if we stayed quiet. I looked at my watch. 2:30. Maybe the light from the fire had brought them. We hadn't thought to cover the windows. We had nothing to cover them with anyway.

The scratching continued relentlessly and I sat, back to the fire, facing the door. I imagined walkers scraping to get in, their fingernails peeling away from their fingers, and an involuntary shudder flashed like lightning up my spine.

"How long they been scratchin?" Daryl asked when I woke him later.

"Few hours" I looked at the door, machete in my hand. I'd been sat like this for over an hour, too petrified to turn my back on the door

"Jus' one?" I shook my head

"Sometimes more. Think something caught their attention." Daryl stood and stretch and checked his bean can for straggling beans. Apparently there were none, and he threw the can back to the floor.

"Need to leave soon" he grumbled. I nodded, bent and pulled up my socks. When I stood and turned to him he was looking away, an odd look on his face. I remembered how I was dressed and felt a flush of heat from head to toe.

"I, er, sorry, I forgot", I'm sorry" I flustered, flapping my arms to pull the blanket lower and reddening even more. He looked at me sideways.

"I ain't" he moved toward me smirking

"Yeah?" I asked, unsure

"Yeah" he span me away from him forcefully "get on yer knees" he grunted, and I couldn't help but comply, there in front of the fire, the sun beginning to rise, and walkers at the door. He rubbed a hand up and down my back under the thick material of my poncho, pressing firmly."Jus keep yer voice down" he grumbled, leaning his body over mine and nipping at my neck. So much for my fading hickey. He ran a finger down the crack of my ass and slid it inside my exposed pussy. I groaned

"Oh god I can't promise I'll be quiet" I bit my lip and threw my head down, rocking against his finger, I could feel myself getting wetter as he moved it inside me. He pulled away from me a moment, and was then back, pushing my poncho up my back, caressing the cheeks of my ass with his rough hands. Then his cock was nudging me teasing at my opening while he kneaded my ass. I leaned back, searching for more, but he pushed me forward, "Shhhh" he mumbled, and I guess I must have moaned with wanting.

* * *

 

Her pussy looked beautiful. Pink, n slick. Glistenin with her need n desire for me. I had to fight not to jus slam into her, I teased, massaged her butt, pulled her cheeks apart and jus looked at that gaping warm hole beggin to be filled. She leaned back and groaned in frustration, and all I wanted to do was look at her. I touched the head of my cock to that slickness again n pushed her forward as she tempted me again by leanin into me.

"Wait up girl" I hissed. Let me savour these moments, I may never get them again. I slid a finger across her wetness again and again she illicitly moaned. I was tempted to spank her, the flat of my hand whippin and wrinklin that tight curve of flesh.

But no, now wasn't the time. We needed to get goin, we needed to get out and get home. The time for teasin was over. I edged against her once more and let her push back slightly as I pushed my full length into her, right to the hilt, My balls swing against her thighs and she actually groaned as they did so.

She was tight, wet, and eager. My urgency matched hers, but she couldn't seem to keep her voice down, Beyond all this the scratchin at the door got louder.

"Daryl" she whispered, panic clear in her voice.

"I know baby" I continued to pump into her, thrustin in hard, thinkin maybe fast was the way to go. The walkers were relentless, but we'd started this, and all I wanted was to unload into her with the sweet view of her ass right in front of me. I grabbed her hips and pushed in deep, hard, she grunted and ground against me and I pulled and pushed her hips. My balls swingin and slappin noisily against her. I grunted and groaned quietly as I could as her voice rang loud and clear in the shack, echoing to my ears from the walls.

It was too much, tryin to hold back, and I let go and unloaded deep inside her. I watched mesmerised, slowin down, as my cock pushed the White gloop out of her in some form of displacement. She grunted, more quietly, a satisfied sound. N I stopped moving against her, she relaxed her stance, cheek to the floor, panting. I slipped out of her and stood. "Nuff games," I said "we need to get outta here"

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> That last line made me giggle.


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Abra and Daryl make it back to the prison, butt now is not a time for celebration.

We staggered, tired, cold, onto the prison grounds later that afternoon. Arms around each other, feet barely lifting from the ground. It had been a hard graft, getting back. 

Daryl had cut my hair, just taken the machete and swiped my ponytail above the band. I didn't question it, we had to think of safety. I relieved him of his underpants, and wore them now beneath my poncho. 

My legs were still bare, though. My damned legs. Carpet burn stung against my already grazed knees, but the scratches? They were something else entirely.

I had waited, the whole journey back from the lake, for the burning to start. It hadn't, not yet, they stung, they were deep, but there was no burn. 

I looked at Daryl as he trundled forward, arm around my waist firm, painfully so. He was sweating, despite the cold, his face running with the exertion. The walkers had not thinned out as we had hoped. The walkers had in fact hoarded together even more. Countless deformed and rotting bodies just gathered together, aimless, gormless, bloody fucking pointless.

I stumbled, and Daryl lifted me without thinking, he grimaced, but persevered. We hadn't attracted too much walker attention yet, here at the prison, but doubtless we would.

"Walk" he muttered, breathless, his voice coming through a cloud of water vapour. "You gotta walk. We gotta get ya to Hershel and Dr S"

 

_We had run through the undead. Daryl's bow almost useless with so few bolts, my Machete too big and heavy to swing and kill on point. I wounded more than I killed, that was the sad truth, and the ones I wounded always seemed to come back for more._

I wasn't bit, that kept me going, stopped Daryl from putting me down, made me want so much to get home to the safety of the prison fences. I wasn't bit, there was hope.

 

* * *

 

 

I _opened the door of the shack and the herd had tripled in size from the day before. Too late I slammed the door again but they was on it in an instant, pushing, moaning, desperate and hungry._

_Everythin sped up around me and all I wanted in that moment was more time.  I yelled for Abra to come and hold the door, to help, but they weren't backing off, and even two of us would never keep them out. Instead, she smashed one of the windows and we climbed out after clearing the glass in the frame. The noise alerted some, but most just tumbled in the hut. I felt somethin grab at my boot and I kicked out, got the sucker right in the head._

_If only it were all that easy._

_She got scratched by one she had wounded with her machete. She swung at it, n it fell in a heap, its leg badly injured. She was being clever, taking em out from the bottom up, not strong enough to wield that large knife n tear their heads from their necks, so she attacked their legs, n some stumbled over each other n it helped us get away, she was nimble, n dodged em like a dancer with those long legs a hers._

_But this one, this undead thing with hazed over eyes n long damned finger nails, grabbed at her leg n tore the skin on her calf.  I heard her hiss out breath in front of me, but she dint stop, she ran on, n I had to tell her, I could see clearly, the marks were from fingers, and her blood poured, puddling at the top of her socks._

_There was no stoppin, we had to jus move, and keep movin. Sometimes not in the direction we wan'ed, but we just moved, and Abra danced, and then the prison was ahead, and the Walkers had thinned out, and we were home._

I had no idea if we were safe. My heart beat a thousand times faster than it should, my head span, n Abra was still cool n safe in my arms, but she was scratched, and I dint think I could bear to lose anyone else. 

 

* * *

 

 

I could hear Daryl yelling

"Open the gate!" and he dragged me beside him faster, arm firming up around my waist. It wasn't like magic, like before. The gates opened in fits and starts, but as soon as there was room to get though Daryl practically threw me in. 

I heard the gates close behind us, heard Daryl telling Carl to get his dad and Hershel and Dr Subramanian NOW. 

"She bit?" Carl asked, but Daryl just growled at him and Carl scurried away. Daryl picked me up again and moved us forward. It was starting to get dark, and no one was outside. It was a blessing not to have a million questions from on lookers, but soon people were piling out of the prison. 

The Dr and Rick took me from either side, away from Daryl and the comfort of his strong arm. I looked back to him but he followed. Hershel, unable to help move me with his one leg, started asking questions.

"What happened?" 

"She got scratched, fightin' offa herd" 

"Not bit?"

"Naw"

"Daryl, we're gonna have to take her in, lock her in her cell. We'll watch but that leg might have to come off" I heard Daryl start to complain, but I shushed him myself.

"It's for the best" I said, my voice far away, almost dreamy to even my own ears.

 

* * *

 

 

They put her in her cell, on her bed. I watched helpless as they shut the door, locked her in. Dr S sat with her, took her temperature, wrapped her leg.

"How are you feeling, Abra?" The Dr asked her.

"How you think she feels?" I called in to him. Abra looked at me, eyes clear and bright despite the dark circles, despite the pale and ashen skin

"Daryl" She chastised, and I firmed my mouth.  "I'm ok" She said to the Doctor. "It hurts, but that's all." She looked down at the bed sheets she lay on, then back up to the Doctor, beckoning him in close. She whispered to him, and he nodded solemnly

"I understand," He said "I don't know right now." He looked out to me and concern filled his face "Think you need some rest Daryl. I suggest you go lie down and come back in a few hours. Abra's not going anywhere" but I shook my head

"Naw, I'm fine right here" I grunted. N Abra looked at me again, 

"Sleep" she suggested, but I shook my head. I stopped pacing, and stared through the bars. Abra and the doctor jus looked back at me like I was the helpless animal here. Why weren't they doin nothin? Why weren't they more panicked? No sense of damn urgency. 

Hershel arrived with antibiotics and the Dr set her up with a drip hangin out her arm. They told me we could only wait, just wait n see. Wait n Damn well See. 

"The scratches aren't quite as deep as we thought" The doctor came out to me, Rick n Hershel either side, like I might hit him or something. He was Abra's only chance, did they think I was stupid? "need a few stitches, but we have given her the drip and cleaned her up in case of other infection. It's a possibility with the length of time they were left unattended"

"We dint have time to stop. We had to run" I chewed my thumb, and Rick patted my shoulder. I resisted the urge to shrug him off. "Ya don't think she has..." I swallowed n lowered my voice "Ya don't think she's..." The Doctor cut me off

"No. I don't think it's transferred that way. If no blood, or bodily fluid got in... We just have to focus on keeping her infection free. She's got no fever, her vitals are all round ok so far as I can tell with the equipment we have." I nodded at him. Patience. I could do that. I waited and stalked deer for days without losing my cool.  

"The locked door is just a precaution, Daryl, ok?" Rick was saying "We have kids, elderly people, if anything was to happen" He musta seen a change in my face as he stopped and raised his voice a little " IF anything was to happen to her, everyone else is safe."  

"OK" I said, and he patted my arm again, smilin.  "Doc, is there anythin I can do?" I shrugged, "Anythin you need? Anythin that'll help?" He looked at me and tilted his head

"Why don't you get some rest, Mr. Dixon?"

I relented. What else could I do?

 

 

I went back to her in the morning. She was sleepin but looked alright. The Dr told me that he'd been in n out often as he could without disturbin her. She was doin ok considerin, he said, but dint say what he was considerin.

"why is she naked?" I turned and saw Carol standin beside me, still quiet as a mouse even without her deadbeat husband. 

"She ain't naked" I looked back in the  cage, Abra weren't snorin' now. She din't feel safe nuff. That made me angry. She was locked in, nothin could get her. But too scared to sleep deeply. I thought maybe she was scared a dyin, not waking up ever again

"Ok, why is she half naked?" I knew, whether we came back with injuries or not, that Carol would be the one to ask questions. She was like the big sister I never had, big sister I never wanted. I felt the corner of my mouth twitch n hoped Carol hadn't seen it.  I sighed and gave Carol a look I hoped she could read. she smiled at me a little but the hint wasn't taken.  "The less you say," she said softly "The more you confirm" I turned to her then, annoyed

"Why don't you take ya gossip elsewhere Carol, I aint interested" I didn't mean to yell, and Abra began to stir. "Shit, Carol, now look what ya did!" She moved toward the locked door and looked through

"Hey Abs" She cooed "How ya feelin" 

"Hey Carol" her voice was sleep addled, dopey and not her own. I stepped forward and Abra's face changed. She looked from Carol, to me, and back again.

 

"Hey Abra. You good?" She didn't answer, but looked very pointedly at Carol, who turned to me and ushered me from the door. 

"I was gonna say," she started, her voice very low "before you woke her, she wants you kept busy. She knows you have work to do around here, how much people need you here" 

"She needs me" I couldn't help but butt in. Carol nodded 

"Yeah, she needs you to get on as normal" she looked towards Abra's cell door and back at me "she asked me to ask, that's all I'm doing Daryl. For my part I think she's right. You're needed by everyone, Abra doesn't want you mopin by her side all day and night" I fought hard not to show Carol outta the way, but skirted around her and approached the bars behind which Abra lay.

"You want me gone?" I asked. Abra looked at me and smiled

"You got work to do, I got getting better to do. I think it's best for now" I dint stand around to be made a fool of anymore. I left the cell block, then and there, not sure where I was goin or what I was gonna do, but I went, like she wanted.

 

* * *

 

I didn't mean to make him mad, I didn't mean to hurt him, but to have him by my side day and night wasting his time... It wasn't Daryl, and I wouldn't have it.

 

It was a few days later when my fever soared and the hallucinations started. I was almost better, and so close to leaving the damned cell. So close to finally seeing Daryl again.

The doctor insisted I would be ok, kept ensuring my new frinds at the prison that it was just shock, a coping mechanism. The antibiotics were working and I was not going to succumb to an infection which wasn't there.

I saw Ben. He sat on my bed and told me I was so brave, and so strong. He said he was sorry for scaring me in my dreams but sometimes things got jumbled up

"I wanted to see you so bad Abra-Cadabra" he said "I wanted so bad to see you I couldn't wait for the connections to be clear" It made perfect sense. "Wires get crossed Abs, thats all. I love you" I told him I loved him too. That I missed him. I think I cried, I probably cried.  I saw Daryl, all long hair and blue eyes. He sat with me and held my hand and I told him he was breaking the rules but he said he didnt care.

I knew he wasnt real, I knew he was a hallucination because he said crazy things. He told me he loved me, apologised for cutting my hair, and touched my forehead so gently to check my fever. That wasn't Daryl. I smiled at this handsome apparition, and told him the things I'd never dare tell Daryl.

 

* * *

The fever was refusing to break.

I stroked her head again, the cloth and cold water Carol gave me to bring in was turning warm, and I needed to refresh it. The Doctor assured me the fever would go, but she sat here talking in tongues. When she slept I demanded they check her pulse throughout the night. They tried to calm me but she was suffering.

"Something the body just needs to get through" They told me.

Abra refused to believe I was really there. She spoke to me like she did the other spirits she saw. Ben, her Mom. She cried sometimes, cried and told me I was liar, that I wasn't really there.

"Stop pretending to be Daryl." she said, more than once "You're not my Daryl" My Daryl. Despite myself that made me smile.

She'd been sick, hallucinatin, for two days. Her sleep was fitful, disturbed by her heat and the sweating. Sometimes she was so completely lucid, and she'd hug me and tell me how scared she was, she'd ask for water, food. Then she'd change, and begin to talk nonsense. Talk to me as if I was Ben, ask me why i'd left her behind to suffer his way.

I was petrified she would die. No matter what the docor said, no matter what Hershel and Rick said, she felt like she was slippin away. I asked why they hadn't removed the leg, and they told me again that this was a shock, coping, mechanism, that Abra needed to see this through. That this was not THE fever, but a fever.

She complained of the burning. Begged me to stop it.

"Daryl" she whispered late at night "You promised you'd do it in a heartbeat. A Heartbeat." she looked at me with glazed eyes "But you wait and I don't know why. Just do it." she reached for me and grabbed at my clothes, crawling up my body, slitherin like a snake "Do it, just make it stop" Her grip was weak, but had real purpose.

I removed her hands, put them to her sides.

"You're not dying Abra" Her face turned sad, and the torment on my heart was unbearable when she said:

"But it feels like I am"

 

 

It was days later when I decided that I needed to get away. Just one day, outside again. I knew what I needed to do, and I went. I hoped the fever would break, but I also wanted to be there when she finally came around. I had this single mission, and once complete I vowed never to leave her side again.

 

 

* * *

 

 

A few days later I was up and about, the scare over, both my legs intact. I felt a little woozy at first but I was allowed a walk around outside in the winter sunshine. My first thought was of Daryl. I was told he'd stayed a vigil by my side, but I didn't remeber seeing him. Not the real him.

He was nowhere to be seen on that first morning, and though I asked after him, no one else had seen him, but no one seemed worried. I headed back to my cell, for more Doctor ordered rest and sulked a little. I was getting bored in these four walls, I wanted to be out. I really wanted to see Daryl. 

I'd have convinced myself he was on a supply run if I hadn't seen Glenn pass my cell. I tried to read but the words were blurring together and if you had asked me the last sentence I read I wouldn't have been able to tell you. 

When night fell, and my brighter state had done the rounds of the prison, and he still didn't stop by, I really started to worry about him and his state of mind. 

I was drifting off to sleep, trying not to think about Daryl, when a light tap came from by my door. I looked up.

There he was.

"Hey" he stepped inside the now open door, and leant against the wall in the darkness

"Daryl" I tried not to sound too excited. "Listen I'm sorry" he held up a hand and stopped me.

"Naw, I am. I know what you was tryina do. I get it." I smiled.

"Good. I'm all better" he nodded, and pushed away from the wall, coming closer to the bed.

"I heard." He reached into his back pocket and pulled something out. He toyed with it a bit and in the dark I couldn't make it out "I got you this" he said, turning and sitting by my feet on the bed "thought it might cheer you up" he handed it to me and I took it

"Can you light my lamp? I can't see very well" he moved off the bed and lit my lamp. As he did so I realised what I was holding.

A hunting knife. As the light flowed and lit the room I turned over the item in my hands. It was pink. Pale pink, but it was real. The handle was shaped like an angel wing, like those on the back of Daryl's vest. I looked up at him

"Daryl" I breathed "oh my god it's gorgeous!" He smiled, and sat with me pulling something else out

"Here. Next time, keep it in here, even if Ya swimmin" it was a pale pink leather belt, with a slot designed for the knife, and another I could put my gun in. I grinned up at him, opened my arms, and he fell into them, his mouth finding mine, mumbling against my lips.

"Don't ever scare me like that again"


End file.
